If you keep an open mind in life it usually pays off and in some style too!
RIE as a method of parenting has been around for over 35 years. It will astound and amaze you what you can achieve with your baby or toddler. It is NOT a ‘Hollywood Craze’ either , keep an open mind and take a look!
RIE parenting gives parents a real sense of relief from what they feel is ‘normally’ expected from them as a parent. The mainstream notion is that children need constant stimulation and that a parent has to be able to deliver this to ensure the babies development and happiness.
RIE parenting does not do things this way. At RIE parenting classes babies and toddlers are encourage to move naturally within a larger space and to all intents and purposes to make their own decisions and choices as part of their development. ‘Do Less and Observe More’ say the RIE teachings and method.
RIE parenting may seem forgiving of the parents but it does allow them to trust their instincts and the childs too for that matter.
Many parents who learn RIE parenting feel more thougfhtful and confident with their child and the effects of the classes can be pretty profound. RIE teaches natural stuff like children interacting between themselves and stimulating each other rather than parents saying ‘you have to swim now’ or ‘let’s dance now’. The watchword is ‘Natural’.
RIE parents do not just sit there and let their child cry and not pick them up to comfort them. This is a misconception. RIE teaches how to pick them up and not to ‘snatch’ them up from where they are. A child would be spoken too about their situation in a calm way and then told that they were goind to be picked up. A subtle and BIG difference.
One of the fundamental principles of RIE parenting is ‘respect’. Often in life it is a much overused work but in the cae of RIE and the teachings of Magda Gerber it makes total sense.
By showing your baby or toddler respect under RIE parenting you will feel that maybe you are making mistakes. This is normal in life and we all do it.
If you make mistakes this does not mean that you are a bad parent. Actions are ‘choices’ some good ones and some bad ones. Life is all about learning by trial and error – parent’s don’t want to be inadequate parents and they don’t want to make mistakes but however you raise your child you will make them.
Here is an example of ‘respect’ in RIE parenting for you to ponder and understand what makes RIE different. Let’s imagine your baby needs a nappy or diaper your instinct would be to grab the baby and change the nappy.
With RIE parenting you would learn to incorporate respect into this action as follows:
Firstly, you would check whether by removing the nappy if you would be interrupting the baby. Then you would say to baby “I am going to change your diaper”. Followed by vocally telling the baby that you would like to pick them up and ask them if they are ready?. Wait for a response of arms reaching out to you…then you change the diaper.
The baby with RIE has an active participation in their care and not a passive one. This is the kind of respect shown to a child with RIE.
Our lifestyles today are so busy and stressful and you really do not have to do SO much to care for your baby. Gerber’s mantra is ‘do less and let the baby’s develpoment unfold naturally’ . You have less stress and you learn to give your baby the lead.
Magda Gerber one of the leading exponents some 30 years ago of RIE parenting coined the phrase ‘educarer’. RIE stands for Resources for Infant Educarers. So what is an ‘educarer’.
Put simple it is a mix of the words ‘education’ and ‘caring’ .
Gerber taught that real love is demonstrated by showing and teaching respect. RIE teaches parents to slow down and to pay attention to their childs signals. Babies are given lots of time and space for uninterrupted playtime.
This gives a child, teaches RIE parenting, a good start in life and for the parents it means less ‘fussing’ and trying to always be doing something with a baby or toddler. Amazingly, children are more than capable of amusing themselves and learning at their own pace. RIE parenting is not just for parents but grandparents and god parents too. RIe parenting is inclusive not exclusive.
The great thing about letting a baby ‘be’ is that parents can just ‘be’ too. RIE teaches that that pushing or at worst forcing a baby to do something actually has a detrimental effect on their natural devlopment. This can lead to a sense of failure and even disappointment.
RIE’s attitude to toys bemuses some people but it’s teachings do make sense. If you put a toy infront of a child they will grab it and play with it when they are good and ready. If they don’t then there is little interest and the mistake would be to force the issue with the child.
Babies are taught to be happy, independent and curious and most importantly a very willing and active participant in the process of learning. RIE parenting is about educating and caring hence the term ‘educarer’.
So what exactly goes on inside a RIE parenting class? Nothing odd or sinister that is for sure.
A typical class would see parents at a baby group meeting sit to the side of their child as babies and toddlers crawl around a large area that is stocked with well chosen and carefully place RIE approved toys. No flashing lights and whirring and buzzing toys for RIE babies as these are considered too ‘distracting’.
Classes are always hele by fully qualified certified instructors who supervise the class and share their knowledge imparting information on a wide range of subjects from sleeping habits through to play time and even mood swings.
Babies are encouraged to explore their environment without being overwhelmed with instructions, direction or any form of criticism. A positive thing without a doubt.
Parents are taught not to put their children in positions they can’t independently get in to or escape from. Magda Gerber one of RIE parentings ‘founders’ felet that this encourages ‘empathy’ which is a bid result for bothe the adults and the children.
The next stage up from these fairly basic classes is for parents who perhaps are more devoted to the idea of RIE parenting than others. They can take RIE training and get to experience what it is like to be hand fed, to be criticized when playing on the floor and what it feels like to be ignored or over parented with undue fuss and intervention.
RIE pronounced ‘wry’ is a way of parenting that is based on the philosophy and research of a lady called Magda Gerber. RIE parenting has been a buzzword around Hollywood in Los angles for sometime now and has a ‘celebrity’ following that includes William H Macy, Jamie Lee Curtis , Helen Hunt to name a few.
RIE parenting – Resources For Infant Educarers – is all about slowing down life to baby’s pace and it’s difficult to understand how anyone could disagree with that philosophy. Todays world is too frenetic and we expact says RIE, too much from our kids.
Followerrs of RIE tend to be intelligent creative types and this attracts a lot of sneering from people who perhaps should know better. As with anything critics line up to question anything unknown or new. So this is how RIE shapes up with them.
The most common allegation is that RIE is a secret cult . Nonsense of course. Another is children should be controlled properly as it is the only way of raising them. There has been a lot of weird stuff written about RIE parenting classes too. It is true enthusiastic parents are encouraged to experience what their baby does as a way of helping them understand why RIE classes do what they do.
Parents are hand fed, sometimes ignored, over parented by instructors and criticized when lying on the floor playing. RIE teaches that babies do not need over stimulation and things, desires and movements should be explained to them . Hardly the stuff of a weird cult is it?
It is easy to pick holes in a RIE class and many people do before after persevering suddenly realising that it makes a lot of sense. So parents then understand that to ‘do less and observe more’ may be a neat way of raising their kids. With RIE a baby’s life shouldn’t be a struggle but a path to their authentic self.
Taking traditional toys away from a child is the way of RIE but unlike some articles we have read there are RIE toys that are simple and do a better job. Cups, spoons or even a simple scarf are taught to be more suitable and with RIE and the teachings of Gerba will stimulate imagination and motor skills within the baby or toddlers brain. Just like the ‘old days!’.
We just saw a really good video post from the US. It’s at the website http://boston.cbslocal.com in Boston .
A reporter goes off to look at RIE parenting classes and justifiably seems impressed with what they saw. RIe acknowledges that a baby can understand a lot more than perhaps conventional and traditional thinking. A a group of Mom’s in Boston agree!.
RIE stands for ‘Resources For Infant Educarers’ and essentially teaches mom’s and dad’s to do less whilst letting their baby learn on their own. We have a FREE RIE Parenting video that explains a lot available on this website – just click on the ‘Free video’ link on the right hand side of this webpage that you are reading right now.
With RIE babies have the freedom to get up or crawl away if they don’t want to eat, play with the toy that they want to and not what the parent wants them to play with. Think ‘loose freedom’ based on respect.
At a RIE class mothers sit back and watch their baby or toddler play with simple items with no intervention unless the child is in some sort of danger. RIE parenting’s foundation is an approach that has a certain basic trust between the infant and parent form day one.
Interestingl, parents who practice RIE don’t talk baby talk to their child but instead speak in full complete sentences even if a child cannot do the same. RIE starts their development young in a deliberate and freestyle which is of mutual benefit to parent and child.
RIE parenting presents a 3 ‘coloured light theory’ that makes an awful lot of sense if you think about it. The lights and what they mean revolve around discipline and it’s part in the relationship you have with your baby or child.
The RED light is when your baby does something that you react to instinctively- without thinking. No guilt thoughts you just do it. For example if your baby is crawling towards an open fire or a sharp object like a knife.
The YELLOW or AMBER light is applicable if a situation is negotiable . For example if your child is demanding your time but you have something else to do. ~You may have to do something so if you convey that feeling to your baby or toddler they will understand your needs and learn to respect them. RIE parenting teaches that is your show respect for your children they they will show repect to you.
The GREEN light is often the more simple concept to grasp. This is when YOU want what YOUR CHILD wants. For example you offer a series of choices to your baby in the knowledge that you are happy to partake in any of them.
In RIE parenting you need as many green lights as you can get to offset and be able to accept the red and yellow/amber ones.
We have put together a FREE video ‘An Introduction To RIe Parenting’ and it explains an awful lot about RIE in simple easy to understand stages. You can view it by clicking on the FREE Video link on the right hand side of this webpage.
Rie parenting classes are springing up all over the world. So what can you expect from a RIE parenting class?
They are generally for a child aged from 2 months to 2 and a half years old. They last for between an hour and an hour and a half – so nothing too demanding. Observation is a crucial mantra of RIE and classes involve a lot of it usually followed by questions and answers. RIE parenting classes teach the following basics :
How to repect the individuality of a baby, to learn to trust your child to initiate things and self learn, respect and acknowledgement of your feelings and your baby’s feelings, a very clear way of developing discipline within your relationship with your child or baby,to challenge and nurture your baby in a forward thinking environment that is safe.
The goals that you should strive to achieve with RIE are numerous. They include: practical demonstration of RIE’s philosophies, to pursue behaviour and desire that is reasonable, learning as a parent the observation skills necessary to see what your child is learning from ‘playtime’ and understand exactly how they are learning. Classes strive to assist on a philosophical and practical level a parents development of growing into their role.
To find out more about RIE before you venture to a class please watch our FREE ‘RIE PArenting Explained’ video that you can sign up for – the link is on the right hand side of this website – simply click on the link and you are away!
You may have heard of RIE or Rie parenting as a method of understanding your babies experiences in a very positive way. It does however as a ‘mindset’ take a little bit of getting used to. Look at it as a sort of ‘back to basics’ approach to being a parent , let go of all your preconcieved ideas and embrace RIE parenting with an open mind.
You may have heard that RIE parenting is some sort of ‘celebrity craze’ which is nonsense by the way. It is tru that some fairly high profile individuals in tinseltown have publicised RIE because they practice its formula and teaching BUT RIE is well know to attract creative people and parents as it encourages breaking down the barriers of conventional parenthood. Proponents include Toby McGuire, Helen Hunt, Jamie Lee Curtis.
We have a FREE video that you can access on this page- just ‘click’ the link on the right-hand side of this page and you will be able to access it.
RIE parenting is about giving your child the right amount of attention and the right type of attention. We have written very recently on the tricky topic of recognising under RIE that you can say ‘NO’ to your baby or toddler. That post would be well worth a look at.
RIE encourages you to have less distraction in yoru home life to forge a meaningful and healthy relationship with your baby. Less using the phone and computer and MORE time to attend top your baby. The idea of errand running with your little one is not the RIE way as the time you spend together should be ‘natural’ and ‘experience’ intensive not a diluted form of togetherness.